shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.