I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize