I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
