people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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