But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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