you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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