i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
do herpes really smell.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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