I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize