I want to walk on stilts...naked
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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