I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
