girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
accomplished twins. life is a go
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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