Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry kdeanne13 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(931): View more from Tennessee

How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??

Fav 11 3213 1371
share tweet
(912): View more from Georgia

I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers

Fav 16 4915 1031
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(949): View more from California

I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.

Fav 4 3445 1370
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them

Fav 25 4999 1359
share tweet
(443): View more from Maryland

i drank out of a bidet.

Fav 16 1086 4676
share tweet
(770): View more from Georgia

You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.

Fav 3 1718 902
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(703): View more from Virginia

I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM

Fav 6 3036 802
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(604): View more from British Columbia

I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.

Fav 1 56 3
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(919): View more from North Carolina

This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs

Fav 0 26 44
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT