Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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