it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
