I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
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I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
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And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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