I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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