I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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