i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
