the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
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