I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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