Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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