I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
