she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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