Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize
