I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
