You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Randomize
