Pappa wants mamma naked
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
You were trust falling into bushes
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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