you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
