I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
