Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize