Swine flu. Run for my life!
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
