I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
this will be a night to untag.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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