y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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