Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
