Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
