I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
