No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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