I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
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Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
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I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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