My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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