She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
