dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
