dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Randomize