He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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