you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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