did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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