we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
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I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
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She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.