Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
