I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
