she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex