Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
It's rum buckets o'clock
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
