Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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